Fruits of Labour

I am back !! I am back on my blog after a long gap. It’s really difficult to ‘invent’ excuses for such long breaks. I would leave it to your imagination.

Initially, when I put the title of this post in the “Next to Come” section of my previous post, I had planned posting some good snaps of the spring blooms in my office campus. However, sometimes things do not work as per ‘plan’. Blog post is still a small thing. What if things do not work out in a similar way in the big picture of life. To some extent, it did happen to me. In searching my life mate. I had to go through the conventional ‘arranged’ marriage method. Quite a long, complicated and frustrating process. I was ‘presented’ to all kinds of people. Even ‘unknown’ people used to come forward with ‘best’ match for me. I used to wonder if telepathy works. Most of the time I never met the prospective groom. Well protected!! Whenever I did a get a rare chance to meet, I found some really strange and unexpected characteristics. Let me deal with just the ABCs

* Attitude: This one was really unexpected. I met one guy who wanted his future wife to be a ‘house wife’ (not home maker). Moreover, when I asked this guy why he wanted to meet me knowing that I am a working woman. He said that all his friends’ wives are educated and working. So, he wanted someone to be in that social circle!! I was perplexed!! So he expected that I will quit my job for his whims!!

It is really not demeaning to be a home maker. In fact, I feel it is one of the very tough jobs. Many times the efforts go unrecognized and job remains the least thanked. You don’t even have a promotion!! Nevertheless, I personally feel it should be left to the choice of the woman to choose her way of life: as a working woman or as a home maker. If you note closely, it is not about a job but it is about the attitude. I have many such incidents to quote about the attitude of literate (Meaning: has many professional degrees but no education) prospective grooms.

* Beliefs: Horoscope plays a huge role in arranged marriage. Many people believe that horoscope match is the most important thing. Though I respect their belief (it is their choice), I feel that a frequency and wavelength match of the future couple is the most important thing.

Another primary belief I have observed is that guys tend to get prepared to marry an ‘unknown’ girl when their mothers like the prospective bride!! I do understand that men really love their mothers. It is called criss-cross inheritance in genetics terminology. Then, is it not important for the couple to understand each other first!! And how about the girl liking your mother!! Please don’t get carried away by those sodium chloride dripping saas bahu serials and think if you mother likes future bride, you can avoid those jhagdas at home. The two women are going to have differences and ego clashes because the fulcrum is the GUY. He is the common element and both try to prove that they love HIM more!!!

* Charming looks: Need a tall, fair girl with long wavy hair and brown eyes. Oh no!! This is not an ad inviting models for a cosmetic product range!! I saw this on a partner preference in one of the matrimonial sites. Are looks so important? They might be important for some but is it the sole distinguishing and deciding factor? I am still wondering.

I can go on and on about the D to Z strange characteristics but that’s not the idea of this post. Am I trying to demean guys and generalise them into the aforementioned categories? Definitely NO!! I have heard really crazy requirements of prospective brides too!! Among men, there are really precious gems, one better than the other. I have really good friends among men! In fact, closer friends than the girl friends I have. I just had to meet all these namoonas before I could find my “gem” (ahem!!). Should I say that HE is my ‘Fruit of Labour’. Maybe, this entire process was to ensure that I understand the true value of my future hubby. I hope, Shan (Shanmugam), my husband, tomorrow morning, does not get up with horns (grown on his head ;) ) after reading all this.

It was not a typical arranged marriage! We first met over a matrimonial site. Could I say it was love at first sight … err … chat. Then over my request and to satisfy my parents and his, he came over to India for just 2 days to ‘see’ me. From there the arranged part starts. And who says arranged marriage sucks. It seems to be working!! Fingers Crossed!!

Signing off!!

Memory of the Moment: Last year, same day, we got married. Yep!! It is my first Wedding Anniversary!!

Next to Come: Flight to France!!